Most of us don’t realize it when we crossed the line from self sufficient to dependent, from self assured to insecurity, from self respected to feeling victimized. Sometimes it was getting into a relationship with someone who was indifferent to our needs or wants. Sometimes it was getting involved with someone who wanted to control us. And sometimes it was just taking a class where the teacher was using her power to be demeaning and critical. Whenever the change took place, you might have started believing the lie that you didn’t matter, that if only you tried harder you could make that person love you, or that the teacher was probably right, you are stupid.
Resigning from Victimhood.
It only takes some brain power to begin a positive self talk program that recognizes your worth as a human being and gives you the courage to push against those negative forces that try to bring you down.
A harsh remark, a sour look, or a sigh could be the trigger that, in the past would send you to a world of hurt.
When you resign from victimhood, you act like a duck and let it roll off your back. Shake it off and keep going. You are worth a world of self respect.
If you want self respect, it is alway helpful to give respect. Respecting yourself could come in the form of staying away from people you know will be rude or unkind to you.
14 Days in Ireland – Day 4: Slieve Donard Overlook (again), Tea with Violet, Cushendall, Cushendun, Torr Head, and Dunluce Castle
If you want to get away from it all, enjoy!
Too many single parents have the always tired feeling. No wonder, you do so much! It isn’t your imagination, you are bone weary because you are trying very hard to get it all done and don’t have that extra helping hand. You juggle so many details every day, and it can sometimes be overwhelming. Now that school is starting, you have even more appointments, and yet at the end of the day, you will have gotten it all done.
Give yourself an atta girl or atta boy for all the many things you do as a single parent. If you are waiting for your kids to appreciate your full plate, you may be waiting until your hair is grey! Do yourself a favor and after work, and a minute listening to kids’ day, sit in a quiet place and just veg for at least one half hour. If your vegging is to take a walk, then do that, but you have to have some fill up time. I read a mediation book to quiet my mind. Some people watch the cooking channel! Whatever you need to fill up, do it without guilt. You will always be there for your kids, but if you don’t put that oxygen mask on first, you will have a too run down parent on your hands, and that’s not good.
Many single parents who are in a relationship don’t want to bother the other adult in the house because it isn’t their kid. They feel they must take on all the responsibility, for fear they will overwhelm, bother or burden the other person. Why don’t you ask and see?
I’m in your corner. I am your best cheer leader. You are an amazing parent. Now you just have to realize that yourself!
Talk to you soon…